Ask Dr. Hal

Wed, Nov 9
9:00pm (WE MEAN IT!)
$7

"ASK DR. HAL" ANNOUNCES 6TH NONPAREIL SHOW!
DATE WILL MARK COMPLETION OF TWO THIRDS OF CURRENT RUN!
TIME-TESTED OPENING ACTS TO INCLUDE ILLUSIONIST-CONFUSIONIST CHRIS =

CARNEY, CULT MUSICAL SENSATION TOSHIO HIRANO THE SINGING, YODELING =

COWBOY
W I T H
TERRIFYING K-ROB EDIT OF A GIANT FLY ATTACK ---
4 SHOWS YET REMAIN IN REVIVAL OF CLASSIC SERIES! HAVE YOU VISITED THE =

NEW & IMPROVED DR. HAL SHOW?
WEEK NO. 6 OF SHOW'S REVIVAL AT CAFE DU NORD NOT TO BE MISSED THIS =

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 9TH
IT'S ALL IN THE VERY STYLE OF THE LATE, GREAT ODEON-- YOU'D THINK =

YOU WERE THERE
AND PERHAPS YOU WILL BE...
FOOD AND DRINK ARE AVAILABLE AT LATEST INCARNATION OF RENOWNED NIGHT =

CLUB ACT, NOW AT MORE LUXURIOUS VENUE WITH FULL BAR!
COSMIC XTRA ADDED ATTRACTION! PETE GOLDIE REPORTS ON STATE OF OUTER =

SOLAR SYSTEM

For immediate release-- SAN FRANCISCO - the award-winning (in the =

S.F. Bay Guardian) Ask Dr. Hal show, now having passed the halfway =

mark in its current schedule, continues at its new venue, Caf=E9 Du =

Nord, 2174 Market St., where luxurious comfort and high style, =

together with delicious food and unwatered drinks, are but the =

garnish to our guarantee of specialized performance at a high level =

of versatility. A ripping new K-Rob edit of a monstrously obese, =

horrible thirty-pound horsefly intruding upon French Colonial =

officers in a North African colony, an explication of awesome =

scientific revelations from boffo boffin Pete Goldie, foul-mouthed =

pirates harassed by living skeletons, ethically dubious Carnival =

Sideshow antics from roamin' showman Chris Carney-- the hand is =

quicker than the eye-- watch your wallet! --and the winsome warblings =

of Country crooner Toshio Hirano are only part of the multifold =

magnificence promised by Ringmonster Chicken John. With yo-yo =

artistry and Iive Internet wrangling by popular favorite David =

Capurro, individual attention from proud-as-punch new dad Phoenix our =

(no longer) "Lonesome Doorman," and the usual glittering crowd of =

geniuses, goofuses, doofuses, gorgeous gals and unintelligible =

drunks. Put them all together and they comprise what we call

the ASK DR. HAL EXPERIENCE!

Special Preview Feature: SEE the Ask Dr. Hal Show-- Right Now! Just =

for those Dr. Hal Show fans who may be distressed that they must wait =

until November 9th to see it all, we hereby provide, thanks to =

Laughing Squid's Master Tentacle Scott Beale, (images of) the show in =

all its savagery and thrilling barbaric splendor. Check out Scott's =

photos by following this link:

laughingsquid.com/2005/10/13/ask-dr-hal-photos-2/

Please remember that the fate of this show, and of future shows, =

hangs on your attendance. So far, the indications are good; we've =

been playing to a full house. Help us keep it going by coming, =

sampling the varied (and delicious) menu, and mainly by drinking. The =

more booze they sell, the more they like us...

A MESSAGE FROM CHICKEN JOHN
Chicken here. Hey, we're sorry about running late... maybe I've been =

trying too hard with the opening acts and everything. I promise not =

to put on seventeen of them this time. Things get a little late, you =

know how it is, with this, with that, we're doing the best we can, =

we're trying, what do you want? So we're gonna limit the opening =

acts, make sure we don't keep everybody up too late, just keep up the =

quality, bada bing, bada boom. Come check us out 'cause we won't be =

doing the show here that much longer. I think I might be going =

travelling, maybe Madagascar, Indonesia, Moldova, Banff, Kyrgyzstan, =

Kuala Lumpur, somewhere, I dunno. If you wanna see Dr. Hal, you got =

four more chances to get down here. What more can I say? That's all.

MYSTERY GUESTS, SURPRISES
As always, the programme at "Ask Dr. Hal" may be subject to last- =

minute scheduling changes. But we guarantee you'll go ga-ga over out =

opening lineup. Then, in the main part of the eve's presentation, Dr. =

Hal will essay to soothe your mental and psychic turmoil by answering =

all questions submitted, after Chicken John sneeringly reads them, =

pouring out dollops of unwatered Fernet for the deserving (and the =

inevitable David Capurro), while the truly unheimlich K-Rob will =

accompanies the action in sights and sounds. Jascha Ephraim, our =

Technical Wizard, will ride herd on the traditional mind-breaking =

Special Effects and of course David will, as ever, keep the show =

disturbingly connected to the digital world. From time to time his =

findings appear abruptly on our Giant Screen, to the delight of some =

and, it must be frankly admitted, the consternation of others. Don't =

forget Pete Goldie, who will bring you the latest from Outer Space. =

Ultra-attractive waitresses, all the while, will bus to your table =

food and drink the old Odeon never dreamed of.

This Day in History...
The Ask Dr. Hal show on November 8th (mark your calendar!) will be on =

the very same day Abraham Lincoln was re-elected in 1864, John F. =

Kennedy was elected in 1960, the Nazi Beer Hall Putsch and Newt =

Gingrich Republican Revolution took place in 1923 and 1994 =

respectively, and Doc Holliday died of tuberculosis in 1887. Also, =

they founded the Louvre in 1546. To these historic dates the Ask Dr. =

Hal show may now be added, at
Caf=E9 Du Nord, 2174 Market St.
It's a new era, folks, and though our show is indeed once =

again a contender, we must emphasize that it isn't quite the same. In =

keeping with the inflationary spirit of the times, we do ask a =

nominal charge of seven dollars for admission, a regrettable economic =

necessity. Less than the price of a mere burrito and beer, or the =

rough equivalent. Beat that! But this paltry, tatty, tawdry seven =

dollars admits you to a memorable salon of music, mirth and =

intellectual inspiration-- it's actually quite a bargain, unlike the =

aforementioned (hypothetical) burrito. But we're not telling you =

everything about this week's programme. Look for surprises among the =

star turns, Mystery Guests, Fernet giveaways and Bardic outbursts. =

Read all about it: check us out at our brand-new website =

at =

=

=

askdrhal.com/
Then join us at Caf=E9 Du Nord, 2174 Market St. Friends, it's =

ludicrously easy to find Caf=E9 Du Nord. You'll locate it without =

hardly even trying-- on the north side of Market, next to the Shell =

Gas Station at 15th Street. But why burn expensive fuel to support =

the oil-drenched oligarchs? Ride in comfort on the F-Line streetcar, =

which stops at the corner of Sanchez and Market. The J Church car, =

the one Dr. Hal personally uses, neatly deposits you nearby. Church =

and Market is also a major Muni stop; the N, M, L and J lines all =

stop at the Church Street Station.

S P E C I A L A N N O U N C E M E N T
by Dr. HOWLAND OWLL

I just wanted you to know that if you've been looking for my book, =

The Meaning of Lost and Mismatched Socks, and not finding it at =

kiosks, newsstands and airport bookstores, now you need look no =

further. For a limited time only, through a special arrangement with =

North Atlantic Books and publisher Frog, Ltd. now you can get it =

right from me, Dr. Hal. It's true-- this attractive, reasonably =

priced volume ($9.95), profusely illustrated by the Author, is =

available for sale at the show! Christmas is coming, don't forget. =

Makes a great stocking stuffer (heh, heh). For anyone who's ever been =

troubled about what happens to your missing socks. But don't take my =

word for it-- just listen to the critics rave:

"Hal Robins (...[writing under the name] of [Perditus U.] Pedale) has =

discovered--and the very amusing, detailed drawings he's put in this =

slim volume from North Atlantic Books illustrate-- that while the =

mysterious appearance of Unknown Socks in your drier [sic] (and the =

mysterious disappearance of the socks you expected to find) may be =

conventionally explained, deeper, darker explanations can be found by =

looking farther than the interior of the drier [sic] mechanism..." -- =

BOING BOING

"If Robert Benchley, Bob & Ray, James Thurber, S.J. Perelman, Stephen =

Hawking and H.P. Lovecraft were all to collide in a Quantum =

Entanglement Event with a pair of Argyle socks, the result would be =

almost as weird and hilarious as this guided tour of theoretical =

hosieristics from the High Priest of Arcane Smart-Alecks, Hal Robins..."
-- Marc Laidlaw, author of The 37th Mandala and writer of the popular =

computer game Half-Life

"...Robins once again offers up his unique artistic technique..." -- =

Winston Smith, contributing cover artist to The New Yorker

"Hal Robins is witty, cunningly arch, downright funny, cosmically =

connected, and very, very entertaining." -- John Shirley, author of =

Crawlers and screenwriter of the film The Crow

"Countercultural impresario Hal Robins... has authored a small =

masterpiece... a delight from beginning to end, filled with lovely =

language, absorbing illustrations and fantastic ideas... that reaches =

an astounding climax... Not to be missed." -- Rudy Rucker, author of =

Frek and the Elixir

Ladies and Gentlemen! I, Dr. Hal, am now not only poised to sell you =

this book right at the show but also to autograph it and inscribe it =

for you then and there, thus exponentially increasing its value. A =

bargain now available-- only fourteen left.

THE HAL SHOW! HAPPENING NOW! FOUR MORE UNFORGETTABLE NIGHTS! =

REMEMBER-- GOOD QUESTIONS ARE REWARDED WITH FERNET BRANCA, THE =

MIRACLE LIQUID, UNWATERED AND AT FULL STRENGTH.

Venue:

cafe du Nord
2170 Market St @ 15th St
san Francisco

Additional Info: